


In Which Aaron and Alex Might Get a Second Chance

by DoctorTrekLock



Series: AU-gust 2020 [20]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Aaron Burr is Full of Anxiety, F/M, Grad School AU, M/M, Mild panic, Minor panic attack, Modern AU, Past Aaron Burr/Theodosia Prevost Burr - Freeform, Past Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler, Second Chances, Single Parents AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:27:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26023414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorTrekLock/pseuds/DoctorTrekLock
Summary: Aaron thanked the hostess and turned to properly meet Philip’s father for the first time.He froze. Or, rather, to meet him again apparently.“I am in love with you, Alexander Hamilton.”Alex looked shocked. “You-- You didn’t hear?” he said.Aaron’s chest grew tight. “Hear what?” he asked, worst case scenarios already flickering through his mind.“Aaron,” Alex said, and - oh god - there was pity in his voice and sympathy on his face and Aaron couldn’t take this and-- “I got married.”“Excuse me,” Aaron said faintly.It wasn’t until he felt cool night air on his face that he realized he had walked out.
Relationships: Aaron Burr/Alexander Hamilton, Theodosia Burr Alston/Philip Hamilton
Series: AU-gust 2020 [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1870924
Comments: 7
Kudos: 70





	In Which Aaron and Alex Might Get a Second Chance

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted August 20, 2020 on [Tumblr](https://doctortreklock.tumblr.com/post/627040446658609153/au-gust-20-single-parents-au)

“C’mon, Dad! We’re going to be late,” Theo called up the stairwell.

“Almost ready,” Aaron called back from his closet, studying his tie in the mirror and putting the finishing touches on the knot.

Satisfied, he made his way downstairs to where his daughter was waiting for him. She’d obviously made an effort to dress up, wearing a yellow dress and flats. Her hair was natural and loose, and for a moment, she looked so much like her mother that Aaron couldn’t breathe.

Then she turned to look at him and she was his daughter, his Theo, again. “Hey, baby girl,” he managed around the lump in his throat. “You ready to go?”

She rolled her eyes at him, but she was smiling. “I’ve been ready to go for ages,” she complained. “Let’s _go_.”

Aaron laughed. “Okay, okay.” He grabbed his keys and his wallet and made sure to lock the door behind them.

Theo was unusually quiet on the drive to the restaurant. Aaron glanced over at her in the passenger seat to see her with her hands folded in her lap, knuckles white.

“It’s going to be just fine,” he told her, reaching over briefly to squeeze her hands. “I’m sure we’ll all get along. You get along with Philip’s dad, don’t you?” Theo nodded hesitantly, her head down. “And I like Philip,” Aaron told her firmly. “So there’s no reason to think this evening will be anything but a smashing success.”

Her hair obscured most of her face, but Aaron could see the edge of her smile, and her grip loosened slightly, so he figured she’d be all right.

It was true, he had met her boyfriend Philip several times when he’d come over so they could study together (and “study” together, but Aaron didn’t like to think about that). And he knew that Theo had been over to Philip’s house as well and met his father.

This was the first proper dinner with all four of them together, but Aaron was determined to get along with Philip’s father no matter what. If this relationship was important enough to Theo that she wanted him to meet Philip’s family, then he would move mountains to make it work.

The restaurant was a local, family-owned Italian place, not casual, but relaxed enough that it wouldn’t make the evening unbearably stuffy. Theo proudly gave her name to the hostess, and they were quickly led to their table.

It looked like Philip and his father were already there. They were talking to each other, so Aaron didn’t get a good look at the man until Philip spotted Theo. His face lit up, and Aaron smiled at the sight.

He thanked the hostess and turned to properly meet Philip’s father for the first time.

He froze. Or, rather, to meet him again apparently.

Theo turned away from Philip to make the introductions, apparently not noticing Aaron’s reaction.

“Dad, this is Philip’s father--”

“Alexander Hamilton,” Aaron supplied, mouth dry. He was proud that his voice didn’t give away how shaken he felt.

He held out a hand. In the back of his mind, he was surprised at how steady it was.

“Aaron,” Alex said, surprise audible in his voice. He reached out and gripped Aaron’s hand.

He didn’t shake it, he just held Aaron’s hand and Aaron’s gaze.

Aaron began to hear his heartbeat ringing in his ears and tried to keep his breath even. His entire world focused down to the man in front of him. The man he thought he'd never see again.

“You know each other?” Theo sounded confused.

“Pop, you’ve met Theo’s dad?” Philip echoed her.

It was too much.

“Excuse me,” Aaron said faintly. He pulled his hand free.

It wasn’t until he felt cool night air on his face that he realized he had walked out.

Aaron strode away from the doors and around the corner of the building. He wasn’t sure what his reaction was going to be, but he knew he didn’t want to have it in public.

He leaned against the building; he could feel the stucco’s rough texture and cool temperature through the cotton of his shirt. His hand was still warm from Alex’s skin.

For the first time, Aaron wished he had taken up smoking. This seemed like the opportune moment for a cigarette. Instead, he crossed his arms tightly across his chest to keep his hands from shaking and tried to focus on the few stars he could see overhead through the light pollution.

The night was quiet. Cars drove past on the main road, but it was muffled by the windbreak between the restaurant parking lot and the road. There were a few crickets starting to chirp.

There was the sound of Aaron trying hard to keep his breath steady.

It had been over twenty years. Why did Alex Hamilton still have the ability to tie him up in knots two decades after--

He closed his eyes and breathed.

> _The bar was loud and boisterous when Aaron walked in, spirits flowing freely and spirits running high. He saw some of his fellow law school students that he hadn’t seen in months and waved back at the Schuyler sisters. He dodged around a couple undergrads and avoided Mulligan and Laurens._
> 
> _There was only one man he was here to see._

There was a burst of laughter from around the front of the building as a group left the restaurant and headed for their car. They drove off, and the night was quiet again.

He heard the careful crunch of shoes on gravel. He opened his eyes, but didn’t look to see who had come after him.

> _Breath hitching with anticipation, Aaron craned over heads and peered around shoulders, looking for a familiar figure._
> 
> _There. By the wall, talking to Lafayette. Alexander._
> 
> _Heart racing, Aaron made his way across the room.  
> _
> 
> _“Hey,” he called.  
> _
> 
> _Alex looked up and his face lit up in recognition. “Aaron Burr! Fancy meeting you here. How’s London?”_
> 
> _Aaron took a breath. “Can I talk to you?”_

“Aaron,” Alex said quietly.

Aaron turned his head to see Alex standing at the corner of the building, his silhouette picked out in the light spilling from the front entrance.

“Alex,” he managed, his voice low.

Alex watched him warily, stepping forward until he stood in the shelter of the building. “Theo wanted to come,” he explained. “But I thought it would be best for us to talk first.”

Aaron bitterly remembered his earlier promise to himself to move mountains to keep her happy. Relocating a physical mountain might have been easier than facing Alexander Hamilton.

“Probably for the best,” he agreed.

> _“Sure.” Alex waved Aaron to follow him. As he brushed past Lafayette, Aaron heard him hiss, “You are the worst, Burr.”_
> 
> _Aaron pushed that aside and focused instead on Alex’s lithe figure as they wove their way through the crowd to a quiet spot in the back.  
> _
> 
> _“What’s up?” Alex asked, once they were out of the loud bustle. “Haven’t seen you in ages.”  
> _

“Are you okay?” Alex asked, his voice gentle, so gentle. Aaron wanted to scream.

“Of course,” he said instead, forcing sarcasm into his words. “I always have panic attacks outside family restaurants when I’m okay.”

Alex inhaled sharply. “I’m sor--”

“Don’t apologize,” Aaron snapped. He couldn’t handle that. Not from this man. Not today.

> _For a moment, Aaron just took him in, trying to capture this moment in his memory forever. Alex looked a little drunk, loose and casual, leaning against the wall. His sleeves were rolled up and his tie was loose around his neck. He had the little half-smile he wore in his rare quiet moments, when he was content with the world and his place in it._
> 
> _He was utterly breathtaking._
> 
> _Aaron wiped his hands on his trousers, jittery tension flowing through him. The moment was here. The time was now._

“I didn’t know you were Theo’s dad,” Alex said instead. “I swear I didn’t.”

Aaron snorted. “I should have known,” he admitted. “Phillip looks just like you.”

> _“You’re my best friend, Alex,” he started. He’d practiced this in the mirror until he’d memorized it, like the opening statement for the most important trial of his life.  
> _
> 
> _That didn’t make this any easier._
> 
> _“You’re the most important person in my life, and you have been from the moment you walked up and introduced yourself, even if I didn’t know it at the time.” Alex went still. Aaron took a breath.  
> _
> 
> _“Even though we’re both orphans, I know I’ll never be alone, because you’ve always been right beside me. I didn’t realize how important you’d become to me until I spent this semester abroad.”  
> _
> 
> _Alex made a pained noise, but Aaron kept going. If he stopped now, he knew he’d never get up the courage to finish._
> 
> _“I spent four months in London, visiting parks and museums and pubs and debating the fine points of international law with some of the best lawyers in the UK, and Alex-- All I could think about was how much better it would have been with you. You make every part of my life better, just by being in it.”  
> _
> 
> _Aaron took a deep breath, almost dizzy with nerves and anticipation and the adrenaline of finally,_ finally _, telling Alex what had become so clear to him. “I am in love with you, Alexander Hamilton.”_

“I’m sorry,” Alex said quickly. “For what I said. Then.”

Aaron closed his eyes.

> _Alex looked shocked. “You-- You didn’t hear?” he said._
> 
> _Aaron’s chest grew tight. “Hear what?” he asked, worst case scenarios already flickering through his mind._
> 
> _“Didn’t I tell you?” Alex, who was always twelve steps ahead, looked lost.  
> _
> 
> _“Tell me what?” Aaron demanded, desperation mounting behind his breastbone.  
> _
> 
> _“Aaron,” Alex said, and - oh god - there was pity in his voice and sympathy on his face and Aaron couldn’t take this and-- “I got married.”  
> _
> 
> _The world stopped._

“I know it must have been a shock.”

> _What? Did he say? Aaron couldn’t shape the questions that he needed to ask, words failing to capture all he needed to say._
> 
> _“It was sudden, you know? Eliza and I just clicked and we eloped yesterday. This--” Alex laughed awkwardly, and Aaron heard it muffled from a thousand worlds away. “This is actually an impromptu reception.”  
> _
> 
> _No, no, no. This couldn’t be happening. This was worse than any nightmare could have predicted. Move aside, unexpected public speaking and presenting in court without pants, here comes confessing your love to a newly married man, Aaron thought giddily._
> 
> _“I texted you about it,” Alex told him. “I swear I did. Yesterday. I mean, it wasn’t that serious before, but...”  
> _
> 
> _Aaron stopped listening. There was nothing Alex could say now that would make it better. Only things that could make it infinitely worse._
> 
> _His phone, his_ phone _. The one he’d conscientiously turned off at the beginning of his flight and hadn’t checked since. The phone that could have told him this was coming._

“Not your fault,” Aaron managed around the lump in his throat the memories had conjured. “I should have known.”

“I’m still sorry.”

> _“Excuse me,” he heard himself mumble politely before swaying away from Alex and making a beeline for the door.  
> _
> 
> _“Hey, Aaron, Aaron!” He heard the voice behind him, but didn’t stop. The numb wall inside him could only stand for so long, and he refused to compound his utter humiliation by breaking down in front of Alex.  
> _
> 
> _As he stepped into the warm June night, he felt the first tears wet his cheeks._

“Then you left so suddenly,” Alex said. “And you were gone the next day. No one knew where you went. You just...vanished off the face of the earth.” There was hurt in his voice.

“A friend from high school put me up for a couple days,” Aaron said, looking back up at the stars. “Then I moved to California. Worked as a clerk for a while. Met Theodosia. Finished my degree at Stanford. Had Theo.” He kept his eyes on the sky. “Lost Theodosia.” Aaron swallowed. “Moved back here.”

The gravel crunched as Alex stepped closer. “My story’s similar,” he offered. “Lost my best friend. Had to drop out of school for a while because of it.”

Aaron looked sharply at Alex. Alex met his eyes and continued steadily. “Wrote a lot of journal articles and did a lot of paid research. Had Philip. Made some decisions I’m not proud of. Eliza divorced me. For good reason,” he admitted. “Juggled classes and shared custody to finish my JD.”

He stepped closer, an arm’s length away. “Moved back. Still missed my best friend like crazy.” Aaron couldn’t look away. Alex’s voice grew quieter, warmer. “Did some introspection. Realized some things I should have known twenty-five years ago.”

Gravel crunched, and Alex was _there_ , right in front of him. Close enough to _touch_. Close enough to _want_ , to make Aaron’s heart race again, not like it had twenty-five minutes ago, but how it had twenty-five years ago.

Apparently you never did get over your first love.

“Aaron,” Alex murmured.

“What did you realize?” Aaron asked, because he _had to know_. If this was going where he thought it might be, he _had to know_. Before it turned out just like twenty-five years ago.

“I started falling in love with you the moment I introduced myself,” Alex told him.

Aaron kissed him.

He reached out and he clutched Alex’s shoulders and he pulled Alex in, closer, ever closer. And Alex came willingly, folding himself into Aaron’s embrace and putting his hands on Aaron’s hips, pushing him back into the wall and pressing himself all along Aaron’s front.

He was _there_ , surrounding him, until every sense was filled with _Alex_.

Aaron tasted him until he couldn’t breathe, and then he tucked his head into Alex’s neck. He didn’t smell the same, not nearly. But there were still notes that matched, that meant _Alex_ in the back of his mind.

He wasn’t sure how long they stood there in the shadow of the restaurant, simply existing in each other’s space, before Alex murmured, “We should probably get back inside.”

Aaron lifted his head, only then registering how long it had been since he’d fled. “Oh god,” he said reflexively. “Theo.”

“They’re fine,” Alex told him, relaxing his hold and starting to step back.

Aaron found himself clutching Alex again, unwilling to let him go now that he was close enough to touch.

He cleared his throat. “Sorry,” he muttered, relinquishing his grip on Alex’s shirt.

Alex smiled at him softly. “They’re fine,” he repeated. “Worried, of course, but I told them I’d come talk to you. I told them to start without us,” he added. “So I think if we time it right, we might still make dessert.”

Aaron knew he was grinning like a loon, but he couldn’t help it. The adrenaline had given way to a flood of endorphins, and he didn’t know if he would ever stop smiling. “Sounds like a plan.”

He reached out for Alex’s hand and felt a flutter of happiness when it was immediately offered. The two men walked back to the front of the restaurant, shoulders brushing the whole way.

Aaron knew there was a lot left to do. He would need to reassure Theo, first of all. Probably sit her down and outline what had happened between him and Alex then and what was probably going to be happening now.

He needed to talk to Alex. A lot. Aaron glanced over at him. The content half-smile on his face was the same one that he’d worn twenty-five years ago, Aaron realized with a jolt. The one that meant everything was good.

He squeezed Alex’s hand just to have the other man look over at him and share a warm smile.

They would definitely need to talk. It might not lead to anything, though the strength of Alex’s grip said that was an unlikely possibility. It might lead to something good.

Or, Aaron thought as Alex held the door open for him, it might lead to something amazing.


End file.
